I'm moving over my blog from a private diary. In the process of transitioning, I will be posting a few of my favorites here. Heck, Oprah and Ellen do repeats, why can't I?
This entry was from April 2008.
Earlier this week, I had to go on a business trip that included flying. I'm not one for doing anything alone, but since I work in a remote office, I had to make the trip by myself. This trip was my second business trip by myself this month. Each leg of each trip is so different. I generally like to have brief conversations with the people I'm sitting next to on the plane. I do bring a book just in case I'm sitting next to a sleeper, a reader, or on the rare occasion, an empty seat.
On the trip up, I sat next to a large man who listened to his MP3 player the entire time. When I say large, I mean, he was probably six foot six and built like a football player. He should have asked for an aisle seat or the exit row, but instead, he sat quietly in the middle seat of row 43. I tried to read my book, but you know that the back of the plane is like the back of the school bus. People have great conversations and laugh more in the back. I wanted to be a part of the conversation, but I couldn't see anyone past the large man in the middle seat and the high-backed seats in the plane.
When we landed, it took longer than necessary to taxi to the terminal, and I was one of the last to get off of the plane since I wasn't in a hurry to get anywhere. Since it was already dark out, my dilemma was how to get to the hotel. I could take the train, and walk half a mile in the busy downtown, hoping not to get lost or attacked. That option was not appealing to me, especially because on my last trip I missed my stop and traveled an extra 50 miles to get to the correct stop. The cab ride, however, seemed very expensive at $30 for a 20 minute trip. So I took the shared ride shuttle. This ended up being a worse choice than the train. The van had two air fresheners hanging from the rearview mirror. One was pine and the other was vanilla. If you have never combined the two, I'll tell you that the combination smelled like a cigar. This was tolerable for the first 20 minutes of sitting in the van, which by the way was still not moving. The driver took the shared ride philosophy literal, so we were waiting for at least one more person that was going my way. After 15 more minutes, my eyes began to itch and I started to sneeze. I started to wonder if the air fresheners were there to smell like cigars, or instead, to cover up the smell of cigar smoke.
Either way, we were on our way shortly after a backpack carrying college student boarded the van. The twenty minute drive was completely silent. The driver didn't even have on NPR like so many of the drivers do. Complete silence. I was too tired to start a conversation, and really not invested enough in the other passenger to be worried about it. So when I go to the hotel, I hopped out quickly, got my receipt, and headed to the front desk.
The doormen smiled and said hello. Hello doormen. Thank you for smiling and holding the door. I bet they would be talkative on a plane. After checking in with the lady at the front desk, who welcomed me back, I was off to my quiet room all by myself. I wanted to call home, or call my mom to say I made it safely, but it was after 11pm and I was too tired to talk anyhow. Besides, my breakfast appointment was at 7am, so I really needed to get settled in.
The meetings went well, and I talked to a hundred or so people at our presentation. I got to meet with the people that I work with, but rarely see. And I got a chance to catch up with some people that I haven't had any contact with for a few years. Overall, it was a successful business trip. As wonderful as any business trip is, though, I'm always ready to go home. Today was no exception. So after a quick change of clothes, I was off to the train. Really, $1.75 versus $30 isn't really a choice when it's still light out. On my way to the train, I ran into a girl I used to work with a few years ago. It was our first time to talk in years. It was as if we had never not talked. We had about 20 minutes to catch up on news about everyone we knew and with what was happening with us. It's nice to have those relationships. Once she left the train, I was back to the traveler's silence that had plagued me on my trip up.
I do find that a friendly hello gets smiles from the airport security. Those folks must feel like I did when the doormen said hello to me. If a smile is truly an international language, then I can say that I am bi-lingual. I speak smile. Whenever I travel, I make sure to look all security in the eye and flash a smile. I also engage them in conversation at every opportunity. A smile definitely says you are appreciated.
Walking through the terminal is always a quiet trip when you are alone. Everyone is off to their gate, listening to the announcements, and looking for something to eat. Once you make it to your gate, the standard behavior is to find a seat away from everyone else and then busy yourself. I usually sit by the windows and work on the computer. Today, the air conditioner was colder than usual and I didn't have a jacket handy. The row I moved to had only a few passengers, but was filling up quickly. It was quiet except for the people using their cell phones to conduct business. Their conversations are great business advertising since they say the name of their company about 20 times in an hour.
I was joined by a mother traveling with her 2 sons. She tried to tell the one closest to me not to read what I was typing. I turned and told him he could read if he told me where the typos were. He informed me that he was only 6 and couldn't read any of it. We had a great conversation. I learned about their family, their hometown, and the Webkins they were carrying. When it was time to board, I headed to the bathroom as I traditionally do since I refuse to use the bathroom while in flight. I'm amazed how many people have to pee during a 90 minute flight. I guess my mom must be the only parent that ever said to go before you leave.
Our plane had been downsized, and everyone's seats were reassigned. I ended up sitting the the exit row. Wow! I didn't know about all the leg room. At any rate, I had an empty seat between me and another big guy. He helped me get my book from my luggage in the overhead compartment. We agreed that he would be responsible for the high stuff, and I would get the low stuff. So when he was struggling to find his seatbelt, I fulfilled my obligation by handing him the belt that was hanging from his seat. They closed the door of the plane and still no one sat in the middle seat. It was going to be a great trip home. Then it happened.
Because there were so many open seats, the opened the door to allow other people on the plane and told them to sit wherever they saw an open seat. I saw her coming and knew it was going to be bad. The pretty young blond with a tight t-shirt with glittered stars made her way to the empty seat by me. She flicked her long blond curls into my face a few times, as I kept telling myself that it was only an 70 minute trip. She talked briefly to the tall guy, but he took out a book and began to read. The signal that he didn't want to talk. So she turned my way.
We were still on the ground when she told me it was her first trip ever on a plane. The first leg of the trip was on a very small plane that was too loud to talk to anyone. That was the same kind of plane I was on when i made my first trip on a plane. She was a 26-year old waitress from Michigan who left a bad relationship and was in desperate need of a vacation. Her 2 children were with their grandmother, and she missed them terribly already.
We talked the entire time we were on the ground and as we took off, I watched her smile with excitement as we headed up to the sky. I realized that she was almost young enough to be my child...and the same age as the daughter of a man I used to date. i got real motherly and she didn't seem to mind. We talked about her kids, her ex, and her plans for the future. I gave her the overhead tour as we were landing. She was excited to see the water and the long bridges. And after we landed, I walked her through the terminal to her new friend. She turned to say thanks and gave me a big hug. What a great feeling that I was able to be there for her. She won't ever know the impact that she had on me.
I drove out of the parking garage and to the toll booths. Although many of the booths are automated now, I chose one with a cashier. We chatted and exchanged a smile. As I drove home without anyone to talk to, I reflected on the people I met and the lessons I learned in the last 24 hours. As I got home, the dogs greeted me and barked through the quiet night air to announce my arrival. Nobody in my house heard because they were sleeping. Too tired to really talk to anyone, I checked on the kids and gave everyone a kiss. As I headed to bed, my phone rang. A friendly voice just checking to make sure I made it home. And when she asked how my trip was, I was too tired to tell her about the silence or about the people I met. All I could tell her is that my trip was fine and that I was tired.
Later in bed, I prayed. I thanked God for bringing me home safely and asked for him to do the same for the other travelers I had met. And as I talked to him, I realized that in those silent moments, those times when nobody is around to talk to, that He is there for me. He always has been and always will be. I was reminded that although I control my steps, He controls my path. Tonight, He put into motion a trip that put me on the same path with people who I would not have otherwise met. My eyes were more open to His goodness and love. And in my final moments of conscience thought, I tried to tell Him how wonderful He had made the trip. Although I was too tired to focus on words, I felt that He knew exactly what I wanted to say. It turns out that God speaks smile too.
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